The Starting Point

Ever since I was single, I had always dreamed of having a maidless family and raising kids on my own . When the opportunity presented itself after my bond with my previous employer ended, with the support of my beloved hubby, I decided to quit my job and become a full time wife and mother.

At first I was planning to be a Work-At-Home-Mother (WAHM), doing business from home and generating side income for the family. But that day never came. And until now, I'm still unsure whether that day will ever come :P

The truth is, I'm truly enjoying the time that I have now with my family. I always hated having to rush to the office in the morning and sending the girls to be cared of by someone else in daycare. The problems that we had before as well as financial issues do not make hiring a maid as an option in our family. And due to my own shortcomings, my household management was not really in a good shape. I also hated when I had to come home late to sleeping girls... 

I always felt that it didn't seem right. But now when things have changed, I'm loving it more than I thought I would... I love being able to prepare and eat breakfast with my hubby (although I admit, it's not everyday!). I love being able to train myself to handle household chores. I love being able to cook for the family (not everyday too! hehe). I love having the time to play with my kids. I love having the opportunity to go shopping when it's not too crowded. I love having more time to do other things that matters more in life to me.

Of course, being a mother of young kids means you don't have any time for yourself i.e. me time. At.all. The to-do list never gets completed, and might even get longer. You no longer have the freedom to go anywhere you want without having to drag a toddler along (who won't let you shop for too long too!). 

However, amidst the far busier and more chaotic life, I truly find peace. It's like I finally found who I should be. Maybe it's the feeling of returning to my fitrah. Our fitrah. Maybe the greatest joy of all is feeling the strong bond of love with my two girls. I love seeing the look in Aishah's eyes and the smile on her face when I fetch her home from her kindy every weekday. I love seeing the joy and pleasure in Maryam's face when I nurse her everyday. Lately, Aishah has been quite expressive in showing her affection too. She sometimes say "I love you ummi/baba!" out of the blue, and gives my hubby and I random hugs and kisses. They truly melt our hearts.... <3

I also love the excited looks on the girls' faces when I announce that we're going to start an activity. Ever since I've been given the strength by Allah to constantly share many activities with the girls, I have noticed quite a positive development lately. Many days starts off in the morning with Aishah asking to do an activity. Aishah, whom before this was quite a cartoon fan, today just turned off the TV after only watching 1 cartoon, although before that I told her that she could watch 2! She came to me and said "Ummi, Aishah dah penat la tengok kartun. Jom kita buat aktiviti!" I was actually cooking at the time, so I was the one who had to persuade her to watch another cartoon! (thinking  about it now, I should have asked her to do something else instead!). Usually she would always beg for one more cartoon to watch when cartoon watching time ends.

Aishah has also showed a vast improvement in giving cooperation lately. She no longer tests the boundaries so much. It's either the time and activities that I've shared with her and the love that I showered her in the process, that have moulded her to be like that, or it's simply her outgrowing her strong-will character (she's turning 4 in less than a month's time!). Whatever the reason is, I'm deeply thankful to Allah for all of this :)

That's why I'm now very passionate about sharing the activities that I do with my kids at home with all the mothers out there. I truly believe in Saidina Ali bin Abi Talib's parenting guide:

"Ajaklah anak bermain pada tujuh tahun pertama, disiplinkanlah anak pada tujuh tahun kedua, dan bersahabatlah dengan anak pada tujuh tahun ketiga."

I believe the first seven years of children's life is all about building a strong bond between them and the parents, in order to allow for the successful implementation of the disciplining and companionship phases in the second and third seven years of their life, insya Allah. 

And that is also why I am also deeply passionate about positive parenting in these early years. My favourite resource is Dr. Laura Markham from the AhaParenting website, which provides really practical day-to-day guides on parenting. 

I've been searching around for resources on kids activities and parenting from muslim websites, but it's a shame that we don't have much to offer (please tell me if you really have found a good muslim website on these!). And that is why I have now decided to heed my sisters' advice to share my wonderful journey of kids activities and positive parenting in a blog instead of in my fb. Hopefully this can be my contribution towards the ummah's dire need of resources like this coming from the muslims ourselves. 

May Allah accept this to be my amal jariah to help me in the hereafter insya Allah.

Ameen, ameen, yaa rabbal 'alameen... 

So now let us embrace parenthood!